As provided for by art. 11 of the Statute of the “Oasi Cana” Association, these Internal Rules set out, for the Married Units (M.U.), their identity, their aims, their character, their internal dynamic and the commitments of the members of the M.U.
I – IDENTITY
The Married Units are small “communities” “on a family scale”, made up of a limited number of (5 – 6) couples-families (art. 11 of the Statute), who share the aims of the O. C. Association and take part in achieving them.
The Married Unit seeks to be:
* A privileged living environment, open to welcome and to the formation of the person and of the couple.
* A “place” of growth for couples who aim not only at the good of their own married and family circle, but set out to be “leaven” and “good wheat” in the humanity of today, witnesses to those deeply human and therefore evangelical values that concern marriage and the family.
* A “place”, then, in which one experiences that “evangelical familiarity” marked by mutual charity and by fraternal correction according to “truth in charity”.
Participation in the life of the M.U. should be undertaken with the clear awareness of being formed in order to grow and to build up oneself, one’s own family, society and the Church. One is therefore a member of the M.U. not only for oneself, but also for others.
* The M.U. are a vital part of the growth and life of the Association, a privileged place of experimentation, consultation, discussion and deeper study of the life of the whole Association.
II – AIMS
The fundamental aim of the “married units” is to reach ever deeper levels of formation, communication and communion, both within the couple and among the couples (art. 11 of the Statute).
* The M.U. wish to be and to become true “training grounds” for authentic interpersonal, marital and family relationships.
* The specific objective of the journey in the M.U. is the discovery, or rediscovery, of the sacrament of marriage through:
- a) a deeper study of the “Gospel of marriage and the family”;
- b) knowledge and experience of marital and family spirituality;
- c) awareness of the marital and family mission that flows from the sacrament of marriage and enables the spouses to exercise a ministry proper to them.
* Within the M.U. this missionary awareness of married and family life is nourished, formed and directed especially for the benefit of couples and families by the rich doctrinal heritage of the Magisterium of the Church and, in particular, by the missionary Charism of St Eugene de Mazenod; a Charism “incarnate” in the Congregation he founded: the Missionary Oblates of Mary Immaculate.
With the Oblates, therefore, the members of the M.U. will seek to share their spirituality and mission in the manner set out in point 11 of the Internal Rules.
III – CHARACTER
* Each M.U. – recognised and constituted as such by the Governing Council of the Association – is led by a couple in charge and by a deputy couple, chosen and proposed by the M.U. itself to the Governing Council of the Association for approval.
* Each M.U. shall take a name in keeping with its nature and vocation, chosen by common agreement among its members.
* The couples chosen carry out their task for a set period (2 – 3 years).
* All the couples and individuals of the M.U. make themselves available to offer this service within their own M.U. or in other M.U. should the need arise.
* Those in charge and their deputies will have specific formation meetings to help them carry out their task properly.
* The M.U. are also open to single people, provided that those who are unmarried or widowed, having accepted their condition of life, direct their energies and their service clearly and serenely for the good of the couple and the family. In this service they cooperate with the couples of the Association in the firm conviction that the “laws of life” – which fundamentally govern relationships between persons – are valid in every state of life, it being understood that what changes is the way the vocation to love is realised in the concrete existence of each person.
* Each M.U. constitutes the natural setting for the formative journey of those who ask to become part of the Association – it being understood that the acceptance of new members is governed by the general rules of the Statute and of the Internal Rules of the Association.
* The admission of a new member into the M.U. must be the fruit of a serene discussion matured by the members of the M.U. concerned and of consultation with the spiritual Assistant.
* The presence of the priest (spiritual Assistant or others) in the M.U. must take the form of a “Marian” presence, offering his specific priestly contribution without replacing the couple in charge in leading and animating the meetings of the M.U.
The priest will help the members of the M.U. to grow in their vocation as baptised persons, as Christian spouses and as a Christian family, a “domestic church”: spouses and families open to the one mission of the Church.
* For the greater mutual knowledge and growth of the members of the Association it is advisable to create times and ways of meeting and sharing between two or more M.U.
* The M.U. will set their own regular times of meeting, keeping to a frequency of at least one meeting a month.
IV – INTERNAL DYNAMIC OF THE MARRIED UNIT
* Each meeting in the M.U.:
- Begins with a short and meaningful moment of prayer, prepared in turn by the individual couples.
- Explores the theme under reflection for all the M.U., or another subject, taking into account at times the particular needs and sensitivities of the members of the M.U.
The individual parts of the theme are to be read and studied as a couple before the meeting of the M.U.
- Devotes an adequate amount of time to the “existential dialogue”, which covers everything concerning one’s personal life, life as a couple, relationship with God, work, and so on.
The couple in charge should help everyone to listen in a kindly, welcoming and profound way.
- Should close with a “commitment” that the members of the M.U. take on in relation to what has emerged from the meeting.
* Good sense, experience, maturity and evangelical wisdom will help to balance well the time given to prayer, to existential dialogue, and to the study of the theme or of other matters on the agenda.
* The outline of the meeting given above is summarised in the M.U. report form provided in the annex, which every M.U. must fill in so as to keep its own “logbook” always up to date. This task is carried out by someone acting as secretary of the M.U., who may be the deputy couple themselves.
V – COMMITMENTS of the Members of the M.U.
* Let every person and couple cultivate their spiritual life: prayer, sacramental life, reading and meditation of the Word of God, other reading that nourishes the spirit.
* In every home let there be the <prayer corner> (Bible, icon of Christ or of Mary, a candle, some other object meaningful for the human experience and faith of the couples and families – for example, photographs, and so on).
* Let every couple, at regular intervals, set aside a space for existential dialogue between the spouses.
This is a sacred time to be found and protected at all costs (especially in our society with its frantic pace) if one wishes to build up that sanctuary of life and of love which is the family.
* Let every couple-family give itself a Rule of life that includes some of the fundamental elements contained both in these “commitments” and in the text “Education in love”. In any case, let each one strive to bring his or her own life into harmony with the fundamental requirements of his or her personal, marital and family being.
* The members of the M. U. undertake to take part regularly in the meetings out of respect for themselves and for the other members.
N.B. Given the personal, marital and family involvement of the members of the M. U., occasional participation in the meetings is not allowed; what is required instead is continuous and active participation.
* Mission: let each one follow above all the guidelines suggested in the annual programme of the O. C. Association.
* Every member of the M. U.,, convinced of the importance of the quality of interpersonal relationships, should commit himself or herself to cultivating authentic relationships “accompanying more closely” at least one married or engaged couple who do not belong to the Association. In this way they become a channel of life for others: freely you have received, freely give.
This is a matter ofradiating outwards by contagion: from person to person, from couple to couple, from family to family, in the ordinary course of life.
* Sharing: understood as the membership fee (for community members and associates) or as a free contribution to the Association for its needs, initiatives and activities.
The fees and/or contributions are to be handed over to the couple in charge or to the deputy couple, and by them to the Treasurer of the Association.
* Let every M. U. create occasions for meeting in a relaxed and recreational spirit, both within itself and with couples and families from other M. U. and/or other people who do not belong to the Association.
In this regard, particular value should be given to wedding anniversaries or other family celebrations and occasions. Let everything be done in a spirit of simplicity and sobriety.
These meetings are fundamental not only for the couples, but for the children, who “breathe in” the “family” atmosphere, genuinely human and therefore Christian, of this small society and Church which is the Association.
* Every M. U. during the year, in agreement with the spiritual Assistant, should plan a “spiritual retreat”.
* At least once a year, let every M. U. carry out a careful review of the journey it has made during the year, in order to improve the quality of life (personal, marital, associative), of relationships and of service.
* Take part in the annual summer meeting. Our experience, now stretching over many years, tells us how important it is for the members of the M. U. to take part in the summer meeting, both for relaxation and for the formation of parents and children alike — as well as for deepening the relationships among all the members of the “Oasi Cana” Association.
